Adult coloring books – Barefoot Lily Lady

Mom is so focused on her coloring. I’ve been sitting at the table with her as she colored for the past few hours. I just stood up to move a bit and she looked up and said in a tone of surprise,
“Oh hi! When did you get here?”
Sad, but sweet. Today I’ve been her mom. When I told her it was time to put her coloring away and get ready for bed, she stalled and pouted just like a child. “But I’m not tired! You always make me quit when I’m having fun!”
Cindie’s Caregiving Journal, February 11, 2018

There are those who wonder why caregiving children speak to their memory-challenged parent like they are a child. Some also believe it to be a bit demeaning to provide child-like things for them to do as activities.

I get the concern. I’ve had that concern in the past too.

Not anymore.

Now that I have journeyed alongside my mother (who had Alzheimer’s), I totally get it.

As Alzheimer’s claimed more and more of her cognitive abilities, it seemed that mom traveled backward in time to a time when she was much younger. Toward the end, she became very childlike. She often thought I was her mom. There was no use in fighting the role reversal—it was part of the disease progression.

Like a child, mom enjoyed coloring. When I first introduced adult coloring books, her coloring was magnificent and her eye for color was impeccable. She stayed within the lines and had the art of “shading” down pat. Now, as I look through her coloring books, I can see the obvious regression in ability. In the beginning, mom would use all of her colors; toward the end, she settled in on yellow and green. In the beginning, mom’s color choices would closely approximate the true color of the object she was coloring. As the disease advanced, the coloring books I purchased for her were simpler, in keeping with her diminishing artistic abilities and instinct for color. Ultimately, in the last few months of her life, much like a child who colors everything in their favorite color, she would color everything yellow or green.

Correspondingly, mom’s behavior changed. She’d have times when she was unhappy about something and would throw a childlike tantrum. Tears, pitiful pouting face, crossed arms and all. Mom reverted to baby-like play on the floor, preferring to crawl about on the floor, rather than tootle around in her wheelchair. Like the child running out into a crowded room butt-naked, inhibitions over inappropriate public behavior goes by the wayside too.

On those days when mom thought I was her mom, I soon learned it was in mom’s best interest if I would just play that role. Putting on the soothing “mom voice” was part of it. Likewise, when encouraging her to do what needed to be done (like changing her clothing), it was necessary to communicate with her as I would with a young child or (sometimes) like a toddler, using what I’ll call “simple speak.”

So, dear reader who has never experienced the role of caregiver, please be gentle and understanding with the caregivers you know. Your caregiving friend is living in an upside-down world juggling sippy-cups, adult-size diapers and discreet diaper bags, mealtime feeding issues, and lack of good sleep. Believe me, your prayerful encouragement and friendship would mean the world to them.

Keeping loved ones with dementia disorders such as Alzheimer’s engaged during the hours when you’d like them to be awake is a key to combating the dreaded, but all too common disorder called Sundowner’s Syndrome. Sleep is vital, not only for our loved one, but for those of us who provide their care.

My mother never seemed to develop a traditional hobby. Following her retirement from nursing, she tried her hand at cross-stitch and dabbled with making earrings, but “crafting” just wasn’t her thing. Our family wasn’t much for sitting around the kitchen table playing cards, working puzzles, or coloring either.

My Mom took over gardening duties when Dad was in his final battle with cancer. I’d say she was a natural at gardening, enjoying spending time “scootching around” on the ground tending her plants and actually enJOYing pulling weeds. Nearly every inch of dirt seemed to burst forth with floral splendor. When we found it necessary to move her out of her home and into a senior apartment, we brought along her favorite blue pots so she could enjoy tending a few of her favorite flowers on her little patio.

Mom’s Little Patio Garden and her blue pots

But, her favorite past-time by far was serving God by serving people. One of the hardest things about her journey with Alzheimer’s was watching her having to give up her various ministries and activities. One by one, as her driving became limited, so did her opportunities to serve. As her knees and arthritic hands gave out on her, the desire to garden fell away. When her memory faded, so did her ability to have meaningful relationships with her friends. Faded memories were slowly replaced by compulsive behaviors common to those with dementia. Pacing back and forth. Rummaging through drawers and closets. Sorting through her purse. It soon became evident that we needed to introduce something enjoyable so that we could redirect her attention from these compulsive behaviors to something encouraging.

We ordered a few coloring books; at first she didn’t have much of an interest. So I would sit at the dining table and color in her books. Sooner or later, out of curiosity, she would join me. Before long, she was coloring on her own. Now, when children come to visit, she loves to have them color with her and will oftentimes take on the role of “coloring teacher” as she instructs her students on the finer points of choosing the appropriate colors, staying within the lines, and shading and outlining.

The gardener in her loves flowers and butterflies, so many of her coloring books feature a plenitude of these these creatures. Because Momma is a woman of faith, we have found that coloring books with Bible verses are especially meaningful to her. [For a link to one of her favorites, click here.]

Thornton’s Art Supply Premier Premium 150-Piece Artist Pencil Colored Pencil Drawing Sketching Set

Wayne bought her this lovely set of Thornton’s colored pencils in a zippered binder-type case. It was a game-changer! For some reason, she is partial to greens and yellows when coloring, but she loves sorting the many pencils in this case. If you should stop by for a visit, you can also be sure that she will take great delight in offering its colors within and an invitation to sit down and color with her.

This Tuesday’s Caregiving Tip: To calm, encourage and distract the anxious Alzheimer’s mind, try coloring.

Tag: Adult coloring books

Becoming a Child Again

Tuesday’s Tip: Adult Coloring Books